Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Mother’s Day – what it means to me as a daughter and a mother


13th May is Mother’s Day



10 – 15 years ago Mother’s Day was unheard of in Malaysia but nowadays it is celebrated by all the communities especially those who have been exposed to western education. Amongst the Chinese the most popular way to celebrate the event is taking mum out for a sumptuous dinner at one of the local restaurants. If we cannot get a booking at the restaurant then we would have a pot luck dinner at home whereby each of the children will contribute a dish or two. If the children are generous, they may give mum a red packet of money for her to use as she likes. The Chinese always celebrates every event with food and money. Somehow the thought of giving other types of presents never occur to the majority of us or maybe we are being practical in that if we give money, mum can buy whatever she likes with it and enjoyment is always associated with food.

Do we need to have a special day to appreciate our mothers or be appreciated as a mother?

As a daughter I try my best to appreciate my mother everyday. I do not wait for Mother’s Day to buy her presents because if I see something I know she will like such as a blouse or shoes I would get it for her. Whenever she visits me I would take her out for a meal or cook the food that she likes to eat. I must confess that I never appreciated her when I was young especially in my teens. I would get very angry and resentful with her if she did not allow me to go out with my friends, coming to take me home at 11 p.m. when the party is just starting and so on. Boys dare not come to my house because she interrogates them thoroughly about their family background so I never had any boyfriends. I used to envy my girlfriends whose parents gave them the freedom to do what they wanted. Looking back now I really appreciate what she did otherwise I would not be what or who I am today. It was after I went to London when I was suddenly on my own that I realized that she loved me in her own way even though she never showed her love for me with hugs and kisses. She would send my favourite food to me whenever someone comes over especially ‘sambal belacan’. I am in my fifties now and my mum still treats me like a child which I guess all mothers do.

As a mother to a daughter who will soon be a teenager, I am sometimes unsure of how to handle her. I do not want her to resent me the way I resented my mum during my teenage years so I tend to give her whatever I did not have when I was young. My family members tell me that I am spoiling her but I think she is very sensible for her age because I try to teach her the values of life that I personally believe in. So far I have managed to build a trusting relationship with her and I pray everyday that this will never change as she grows up. We both enjoy reading ghost stories and eating western food especially salads and Italian food. Her appreciation for my cooking is the best present I could have because it is constant and not once a year. Her love for me is the best present I could have because it is also constant and not once a year. Last year, when I asked her what she wanted for her birthday her answer was “Mummy, I do not want any party or presents. I only want you to live a long life.”

How are we celebrating Mother’s Day this year? We will take my mum out for dinner at one of the local seafood restaurant. I will give her the red packet of money and my daughter will make a card for me which she has been doing since she was 3 years old.

Some famous quotes about mothers

Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God give thee.
-The Bible

We never know the love of our parents for us till we have become parents.
- Henry Ward Beecher

Becoming a mother makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolate.
- Charlotte Gray

"Motherhood: All love begins and ends there."
- Robert Browning


Give the Gift of Hope!

Honor mom with a unique Mother's Day gift that you'll both feel good about. Make a contribution to the National Breast Cancer Foundation in her name! Your donation will help spread a message of early detection and give hope to women by helping to fund free mammograms. Click here for more information.
Thank you for supporting my favourite charity

Cecilia

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